Anonymous-Frog's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[Rtil does DDR]

The movie itself references the line 'Nobody wins in this city', from RTIL's 2007 flash 'Metropolis Circuit', and applies it to the video game 'Dance Dance Revolution', where the quote is now 'Nobody wins in this game'.

This flash depicts RTIL playing DDR, represented by tweening a stick figure with headphones over a dancepad, while the screen shows mild rainbow flashes to simulate gameplay, all in a white background. It uses the same music as the credits in Metropolis Circuit (Slam by Pendulum). All in all, excellent screensaver.

[137 dots]

Boring

Voice was OK, but it just wasn't that funny or interesting. The only real effort here was to draw those 137 dots. I don't suspect copy-pasting, but even without it, it isn't really that hard to do.

[Fish boy]

Feels a little slow and stiff. He was also speaking gibberish.

[pretty dead things]

Visuals still hold up very well in 2022 and look even better in HD.

[KamikakuritsoHellsDestiny]

OK, so there's only audio, and telling me that I need the latest version of Flash Player.

Joke's on you! I'm using the NG Player, which uses the last version of Flash before Adobe pulled the plug (version 32.0.0.363), and several versions ahead of the one used here, which would've been Flash 8. Even Ruffle gets this message.

I don't know. Maybe RTIL has a time machine and was able to get a hold of some futuristic open source version of Flash, animated the movie using that, and submitted the SWF back in 2005, despite older Flash Players not being able to run it aside from the audio. Maybe one day, technology can advance far enough for this flash to be fully playable, almost like some sort of time capsule.

[Friday Night FULPing]

"This is the best thing to come out of Newgrounds nowadays"

According to KiwiFarms. This is spam, everyone knows it, and the creator is known for it. That does not mean give it special treatment. But I will admit, the '6 million' joke was funny when I first watched it last year.

[A Dungeon Master's Hubris]

No boobies here! Look elsewhere.

I feel this has slightly more effort than a Doobus cartoon, almost like it's an upgrade of one. This is proof that a cartoon can be decent, while also being made in a tiny amount of time, but really it isn't practical in the long run.
(Note that Zedrin actually does great art, even if some of it is NSFW)

[Bowja From His Cashle]

Even for a sprite movie, this is crap. Only the barebones of Super Mario Bros sprites were used in the overworld, whereas in the CASSHLE, it was drawn crudely. How this passed and got 150K views is anyone's guess. Probably the joke is that it IS shit. Nowadays that's been done to death, especially from users who aren't capable of making good stuff and thus are dependent on ironic humor in order to survive.

Also, I only know Metaphor128 because of a short in Brawl Funnies, which has @Ukinojoe credited on it. Joe has a YouTube channel with 1.1M subscribers on it, and in 2012, he posted Bowja from his Cashle there. And turns out that he's a talented animator even back then, or at the very least more capable of using Flash.

I suggest the theory that Joe created an alt and submitted a purposely bad flash under the pseudonym of Metaphor128 for trolling or other unknown reasons and submitted a self-depreciating short to Brawl Funnies while his shitty movie was still relevant.